too embarrassed to confess that its taking me this long to get over a ‘story’ that never ever even began but proud to admit that it taught me many things about myself. falling in love with my best friend was one thing— but losing him in the most unimaginable way was another. Dang. I feel insane that I’m still yapping about you that it feels like there’s always a gun to my head whenever I do. But yk what they say— “ embrace your insanity “ hahahaha. I’ll never shut up about it. It changed the trajectory of my life and no I was not being dramatic about it. I can literally write a whole freaking book about it ! As much as how you did me wrong, you know damn well I’ll still wish the bestest life for you. Take care in life — may our paths never cross again, Jerome :)

people would say that my life should not revolve around my history of abuse. i totally agree. but sometimes it really just finds its way back into me. i wouldn’t say it defines me as a whole but i also wouldn’t say it didn’t affect me at all. i’m wounded to the core.

i wanna be loved. but its scares me that i wanna be free and happy more than i wanna be loved.

i wish you knew how much i liked you, even when i hated you all the same. i know you must think of me as a 'sister', but i knew you felt something more than that when we opened up to one another. i know you still like her, and i could've been selfish enough to make you mine. but i like you; and i chose not to have you for myself. because i could never compete with a girl you already love since day one. so, i hope you get the fries you wanted :) i hope you're happy with her.

Sometimes when I’m about to sleep I keep thinking of all the words I should’ve said.

To the man I dearly waited on, I hope nothing but still the best for you. I want to say how regretful I am for all those chances that I've missed. I should have reach out to you sooner and make things work, yet the fear and insecurities I have back then was so immense that I didn't realize I was too late to be your potential lover. I hope you make things right and start anew with the woman that captures your heart. You taught me so much in life that a memory of your glance, made my day so bright. I'm glad I've met you, but maybe in another universe, I hope to be by your side.

Im here to prove them that whatever u face will end in the mean time

I’m tired of constantly being told to “be mentally tough.” I’ve pushed myself to endure everything for so long that I didn’t even realize I was already invalidating my own feelings. Now, all that suppressed exhaustion and pain is catching up to me, and it’s affecting me both mentally and physically.

I wish I could have been brave enough. Now, all I can do is watch you be happy with him.

My heart keeps telling me something is missing—and I know it's you who I keep longing.

I fell in love with you. Feeling pretty dumb right now.. But also pretty great. Ugh.

my anxiety disorder is so severe, i‘m pretty sure it‘s going to kill me one day

i'm so exhausted with the fact that nobody ever feels for me the way i feel about them. whether its platonic or romantic. it's like i'm stuck in a cycle of constantly changing myself for other people only to have them still not care and end up right where i started again.

I'm scared of not realizing my full potential and just regret it for the rest of my life.

sana dapuan ng karma ang ex ko kasi sinira nya ang pagtingin ko sa pagmamahal

I never said goodbye how I wanted. I look for you everywhere I go. Please look for me too.

Letting go of you has been the hardest but most rewarding decision I have made in a long time. Lately however, it’s been more hard than it has been rewarding, because I get sad thinking about how much time I spent putting you before myself, which leads me think about you.

I never told him sorry for all the pain I inflicted. I only blamed him. It was all me. I'm so sorry.

I’ve been with the man I married for 7 years already, but why do I feel lonely and sad?

no one believes me and i think there’s something really wrong with me because of it. i want to hurt myself in front of people so they can see me struggling. i want to yell and scream and hit and cut because i need someone to believe me. i was just hospitalized for the first time and still i feel like no one believes me. i just want someone to believe me.

Bakit kapag sila okay lang? Kapag ako parang bibitawan na lahat para maging okay lang kayo.

mom, i know you love me. but i wish you liked me too.

Mom, you fought so hard to stay, and I thought we still had more time. Now the “I love yous” I saved for later are the ones that hurt the most.

My life feels like I was kept in a box for years, protected from everything. But once I graduated, they suddenly stopped helping me. They expected me to manage on my own, even though I was never given the experiences I needed to grow.

I really thought I was just changing and growing up to finally become my true self after you passed. Now I'm starting to think that I'm just afraid of seeing the person you loved so much in the mirror, the person who died that day and was buried with you

I feel jealous of families who can give their children both the things they need and the things they want. But I don’t blame my mother because she works very hard to provide for me and my siblings. She supports us in our studies and lets us follow what we want. Because of her, I was able to study in a university in Manila, and my older sister also finished her studies there. Sometimes, I still feel jealous of people my age who easily get the things they want because of their families. I’m happy with what we have, but I still feel a little envy sometimes.

I pray that someday we both heal from the things that caused us pain. I’m sorry, Rieve. I truly loved you, and I know I hurt you in ways I never intended to. But there was never someone else. I never loved anyone the way I loved and cared for you — even until now. No other person ever took your place. But I also know I didn’t deserve to be treated that way. Love shouldn’t leave someone hurting this much. I loved you in the best way I knew how, even when it felt like you never really saw or appreciated it. I had so much respect, patience, and grace for you that even your flaws could never lessen the love I was willing to give. I kept adjusting, understanding, and holding on… but somewhere along the way, I started losing myself too. I know you’re hurting, but being hurt shouldn’t mean treating me like this. Love isn’t supposed to feel this painful. And even after everything, my love for you is still here. I just hope you heal from everything weighing on your heart. And if my presence only adds to your pain, then maybe leaving is the kindest thing I can do for you, just so you can finally be happy again. Maybe one day, I’ll also find the kind of love that feels gentle, safe, and appreciated. Until then, I’ll keep loving you quietly from afar and carry it in my heart until it no longer hurts this much.

I yearn for loving. No, not love, but loving. Loving is so inherent to me, I don’t care what my past experiences are, those who stay, I will continue to love, without anything in return. It’s just how I was built. As long as you are with me, as long as you don’t give me a reason not to, as long as you let me, I. WILL. LOVE. because that’s just who I am.

i know what's wrong, i'm trying to do something to change, but still i'm at the worst version of myself

to my sebhastian, i love you always

para lahat kay lola.

I pray that someday we both heal from the things that caused us pain. I’m sorry, Rieve. I truly loved you, and I know I hurt you in ways I never intended to. But there was never someone else. I never loved anyone the way I loved and cared for you — even until now. No other person ever took your place. But I also know I didn’t deserve to be treated that way. Love shouldn’t leave someone hurting this much. I loved you in the best way I knew how, even when it felt like you never really saw or appreciated it. I had so much respect, patience, and grace for you that even your flaws could never lessen the love I was willing to give. I kept adjusting, understanding, and holding on… but somewhere along the way, I started losing myself too. I know you’re hurting, but being hurt shouldn’t mean treating me like this. Love isn’t supposed to feel this painful. And even after everything, my love for you is still here. I just hope you heal from everything weighing on your heart. And if my presence only adds to your pain, then maybe leaving is the kindest thing I can do for you, just so you can finally be happy again. Maybe one day, I’ll also find the kind of love that feels gentle, safe, and appreciated. Until then, I’ll keep loving you quietly from afar and carry it in my heart until it no longer hurts this much.

i’m scared my friends won’t like me anymore. i haven’t seen them for over a year now, i have changed i’m so scared they aren’t going to like that change

I hope the world is being more kind to all of us, where we can live in a world that everything feels so soft and unheavy— where there are no trauma and baggages that we are struggling to carry it alone. Mahalaga tayo ng walang katanungan at pagdududa tulad ng “pero” at “bakit”. You are human, let yourself to feel those emotions, but don’t also let that emotions carry out the real you. You are more than enough than you think. May your silent cry for help will help you this out.

i wish i could be happy for you, but all i see in you is the person who ruined me.

sa tatay kong ibinigay kmi sa ibang family, thankful ako sa gnawa kahit may kunting galit pa sa puso ko.

maybe it is better to stay silent

Reframing the situation doesnt change the fact that I miss the simplicity. Maybe I care too much. Maybe if I stopped caring so much things could go back to being simple.

I’m sorry I always message you a thousand times. All those words never feel like enough. But to say I love you would be too much.

I have always believe in you ever since we were kids. You've always been special. Not everyone is going to hurt you and leave, learn to embrace your vulnerability too. Even if you pushed me away, I will still be here to support you from the distance. Wala ka nang kailangan patunayan, Dom. You're doing well. Hope you get your fuel back. Cant wait to see you ignite once again. 🤍

I expected a lot for my 17th birthday (01-30-2023), but when the day came, I had to take care of my mom because she was sick and my dad was working in his car so I was alone the whole day, even my best friend forgot about my bday. It was the same as every other birthday but what still hurts about that day is the fact that the only message that I received in the whole day was about my 8 y/o nephew. He had leukemia, and the message said that he was in his last days and that he was probably dying in the same day. He didn't. He died just five days later, but the fact that I wasn't there for him still haunts me till this day.

I feel like I’ve lost all my teen years to depression and dealing with trauma. I‘m never going to get them back.

i’m still grieving the person i once was and i am wasting the present living in the past

ikaw lang naman ang gusto ko eh. kaya ko namang nasa tabi mo habang naghheal ka sa mga problems mo in life. pero bakit kailangan mo akong bitawan?

I don't care how much God claims to love me, younger me did not deserve everything I was put through.

I'm sorry, I know I have no reason to feel these way but I can't help but to overthink about his past relationship. I WAS there when it happened, I WAS there when it ended. I know what he truly feels about her during that moment and I keep having these bad thoughts about it. LIKE, I HAVE ALL THESE STUPID QUESTIONS INSIDE MY HEAD, THAT I KNOW ISN'T REAL.

Waiting becomes tiring and killing to the core. For years of it, Im becoming use to it. covering it with maybe just because i love the person so much that I cried in my prayers to let me take care of him in this lifetime, to let me show the love and to be there for him. In prayers everyday. Someday.

gustong gusto ko na magmahal, at mahalin din.

i want to quit smoking and hooking up until it’s too late :)

i just hope one day, you'll treat me the way I wanted to be treated.

I sometimes don’t know how i feel want to scream my lungs out of pain but I can't. I can't feel anything, and some envy me for that but it is nothing to be jealous of in fact, it rips you off the right of feeling sad, all that's there is emptiness and numbness. And since you didn't get the chance to take it out you just carry it around your whole life and i think this's the cruelest thing that can happen to oneself.

i have yet to grieve for the moments i thought would last. i miss you dearly. i always hope that i see the world as you did.

Hi, kuya geloy!!! U inspire me so much, especially in times when no one believes in the things I can do. Hope someday, I will be good enough at the things I love. May God bless u.

I wish i was gone because I know i missed out on the best moments

in my head you love me but you don't really feel anything for me (romanticizing version of you)

dearest me, i know you’ll hate me when you read this 5 years from now. i know you’ll be hating me as much as i hate myself right now. is this the love i deserve?

Am I unlovable, unlikeable and just another speck of dust in this universe? That I don't matter?

1. I survived the worst episodes of my life just because I never want to leave my mother alone in this cruel world. 2. I still hope they would apologise. It’s been around 4 years. I still think about it. I’m afraid it will follow me forever. I’m afraid I will never heal. I’m afraid I will never find peace. I can’t believe that they get to enjoy their life while I suffer. I think that it changed me forever and I will never be the same. I deserved an apology and a kinder goodbye.

I wear so many faces, but the hard thing is none of them are fake

I was 14 when my dad committed suicide. I am almost 23 now. I feel like i’ve missed out on so much of my short life already because of the grief, and deep depression that has followed. I barely had any teen years experience; because I couldn’t get out of my bed. I dropped out of high school. I feel like i’ve disappointed my Father. He was incredibly smart. I went from not getting out of my bed; to being an “adult” who now has to work and pay bills, but at the end of my days i’m always in bed. Sad, in pain, wondering why my life turned out the way it is. I think people expect grief to go away after a certain point, or at least for you not to talk about it. I make people so uncomfortable when I bring him up. I just want to keep his memory alive, because I am the only one that still does. I want to make him proud of me, and I wish he was here sometimes. I know life turns out a certain way, and we just have to deal with it. But I don’t get why some people have it so much harder than others. What did I do to deserve two mentally ill addict parents who were/are abusive? Why do I miss my father even though he put me through hell? I don’t understand my brain, and I never will. I just hope one day I find peace because I truly don’t think i’ll make it past 30 unless I start feeling better.

hello taytay! TY FOR MAKING ME FEEL SEEN AND NOT ALONE (other peeps here was same w my situation also) u healed me in different ways ! i love ur art work sm ♡

I hate grieving but sometimes I am afraid if I stop, you will be left behind in the past

I just wish I could be in a room with you, and ask you questions like nothing else in the world matters. Like your favorite color and things about your past and secrets you’ve kept. I miss you and I don’t even know you. I want you so bad. I wish I could tell you everything. I wish I could look into your eyes right now and just tell you everything I’m feeling. I really do want to be loved by her. It’s really hard being around you when there’s so much I want to say but too scared to say anything. You’ll never know how much I love you, how much I want you to hold me.

To my boyfriend, I love you, so much that I am scared that one day you will just slip away from my arms.

I find it amusing when people are suffering because my suffering used to be a laughingstock

I cringe at the thought of previous versions of myself

Many bad things have happened to me so I always think that i’m a bad person and my family always prove that to me except my mother . 6 years ago, people hurt me so badly but I know i was a bad person and I still think i’m I don’t know anything about them now but i’m Sure they are happy .. they are always that .. I know that they won’t experience the same pain I had .. I don’t hate them now just I don’t care but I don’t forget the pain they caused to me & the things they have said and done ..I had a long time crying and praying asking god why he lets them continue hurting me and my close people .. Now , good things have happened , I have a good job and makes good money so that me and my mother could finally live away from my father as we have always have issues and unstable family .. I can say I ‘m happier than before and the good things are gifts from god but I still have ache .. ache from my family & people that hurt me .. and I can’t resist the idea that they have lived happily while i was suffering and nothing bad that has happened to them .. I know you will say that i’m bad because I don’t wish them happiness but there are my feelings. I always cared for them but I don’t know about them anything now and that have relieved me a lot as I felt that I let the feeling of hatred go..But I can’t forget how they continued in hurting me till the end But in the end i’m thankful for mother and all the good things that I have now and how I still stand on my feet trying everyday to move on .. I know they are happy ..they are always that .. but my problem about this is that proved me i’m The bad & evil.. I still blame myself for my mistakes and i’m Afraid that years are run out of me ..but i’m Trying A note: my problems with my father aren’t the same problems that I have with people that hurt me.. they are different problems and have no relation

I miss being expressive and fearless about my feelings. The world didn’t just break my trust, it stole my voice.

You make me feel something while I'm trying to run away from it, when I'm trying to be numb. And now I kept on looking back to you as I try to leave. I kept on stepping closer, over and over, because to be honest, I fear loosing you. If you need someone, I've been always here waiting for your knocks. I'm always here for you. miss na kita pls, kamustahin mo naman ako oh hahahahaha. ako nalang kase bai kung ako yan e.

you’re starting to feel like a figment of my imagination. it’s hard to wrap my head around the fact that you exist. that you were real, you were here. that i’ve touched you. the only proof i didn’t make you up in my head is all the pain and emptiness for you that still sits in me. i miss you.

All I wanted was you to believe in me, even if I didn’t deserve it.

"It does get better, just don't leave early" And im feeling better now :)

i just hit 200 days sober. i never thought i would make it. congrats to me.

nakakatakot na hindi ako kamahal mahal

I wish I could forget how much "home" it felt your smell.

i always want to ask my dad "how are you?" because dad's are often quiet about their own suffering. but, i always don't find the bravery to open my mouth or my throat would feel too dry when i try to.

nakakahiya ako

I’ve been with the man I married for 7 years already, but why do I feel lonely and sad?

I hate living knowing you didn’t get this chance too, I love you, I miss you.

You know I'm trying right? I'm still trying to make an effort to be in your life when you were never in mine. I tried because I wanted to try and have a somewhat normal mother-daughter relationship even though you abandoned me to my father when I was 2. Last Sunday it was Mothers Day, I truly hate that day. But I still decided to text you and wish you a "Happy Mother's Day" because it's the right thing to do. Even when I stopped texting you for months to see if you would ever text me first, you never did. At this point, it's a battle between my heart and mind. And this time, I don't think my heart is going to win.

I've invested so much guys, disregarded myself to be that friend that is constantly present but here I am doubting and questioning the pain and self-doubt you left me. It still pains me, no matter how much I try to help and better myself. Crying ain't enough.

you walk around plagiarizing me. i wish i could take back everything i’ve taught you. all of the knowledge, all of the music, all of the kindness, all of the art. this is the first time i regret letting someone leave with pieces of me.

Why is it always the good person who hurt the most?

when will you ever take a hint that you're ruining my mental health?

I always make sure I am emotionally available to everyone so that no one will feel the helplessness and loneliness I have ever felt. But I am so tired, just so tired.

unfortunately, i'll always feel guilty for choosing myself

when will i receive the same love I’ve been giving to everyone?

i lost a child when i was 21, i’m 26 now. i didn’t want it so i did a bunch of drugs to terminate the pregnancy. now that time has passed i regret that with every fiber of my being. me and the father eventually broke up but that makes me feel even more remorse as i still love him. we had this unshakable feeling it was a boy. to my son, i’m so, so sorry.

at least you tried, love!

and if the world forgets how love should feel, i'll remember you. -🌻

You hurt me, so I left. It's not my fault that you are racist. It was your decision to side with the person who talked about me and I'm a racist way. This was on you. I won't apologize... Ever.

For several years, I kept asking the same question: "How can I forgive myself knowing that I could’ve done better?"

i don’t know how to let go of you without hoping you’ll come back

i’m 16. i’m not looking for love right now but i hope it finds me in the quietest and softest ways. i hope it finds me silently in the night when i feel like everything's falling apart, or gently when i’m at the lowest point thinking no one will ever love me for me. i hope it holds me close like how friends reunite, like how mothers hold their newborn, or how your loved ones hold your dead body. I want to be loved loudly but in the quietest ways.

I am scared of the person i might become if i were ever to cross paths with you again— my rage for you feels like a bottomless pit and the scary part? i hope it swallows me whole.

How can I say to my family that I was sexually abused when I was a kid by someone they treated as a family.

I feel bittersweet looking at you now that we are older. You were once the guy I wanted to have a future with, but the reality of being out of your league scared me. I left. I’m sorry. Years have passed, I still look and consider you my first love.

It feels like I’ve been begging for the bare minimum in every relationship I’ve ever been in. I’m starting to worry I’m always going to be more in love with them than they are with me.

I think about getting old and wrinkly and looking back at pictures of my brother and he'll still be forever young

i've been terrified of my mother for so long, i forgot what it was like to be loved by her

Somehow I allowed myself to take partial blame and guilt, allowed you to fault me for what was only a reaction to an action. I was the one feeling lonely, even though I had the one person I loved most by my side. I was the one who kept going without dates, without pictures, without moments to show I meant the world to you. In your eyes, we were happy and satisfied. When did this change? When I said it all out loud, even after saying it a million times but with love and care. You were happy because you chose me, married me, held me in the house. You were happy because I was physically there, only for you and to no one else. Brokenhearted, only then did you realize something was wrong. I was crumbling in front of you, knowing this may be the end, but pushing every little piece I had left. The empty feeling, the roommate relationship rather than husband and wife, it all became so painful. Painful to do anything around the house, hurtful to even talk or be touched by you, and exhausting to put effort that is not reciprocated. Suddenly, this weight on my shoulder became heavier. I wasn’t being understood or even forgiven for these hard times. Rather, I carried guilt for every moment I was tired, overwhelmed, and lonely even though you were right next to me. I carried guilt on days the emotional load of the situation took a toll on my physical abilities. The concentration wasn’t on fixing what was destroyed, but was focused on the aftermath of the destruction. I became the wife who doesn’t do anything around the house, the wife who can’t control her emotions, the wife who doesn’t show her feminine side. All this to maintain the image you keep (which is what I fell in love with) and hide the man you truly are with your wife. Even got to the point of messing MY IMAGE with false information to the closest people in my life, how NARCISSISTIC!! The man that chose to keep me and put me under his wing. I wasn’t being shown off or chosen out loud. I was being kept and not chosen every single time. Heck, the cats were more important than the supposed partner sharing life. I was settling for a version of love that kept asking me to shrink my needs. The need to feel seen, the need for effort not perfection, the need for consistency not empty promises, and the need to carry the weight of life together. I feel sad to have put myself through this, not the experience of living life with you (or for you) but for loving you deeply enough to be gentle with it all. Enough to letting you and myself believe that I was in the wrong as much as you were. Not that I am perfect — because no one is — but I was always trying, always becoming a better version of myself, always wanting to live life WITH you. As much as I want to tell you all those unspoken words, as much as I want to thank you. Taking that break and coming back more determined to make this work, only to find you took the love you had me out of your heart. The words “I do not love you anymore”, and “you are now just like any other girl” stabbed me more than anything did in this world. I was not only hurt, but the actions of betrayal somehow became validated. I want to thank you for FINALLY being honest with me. I want to thank you for enlightening me to the true being you are, at least with your wife. My decision became easy here, no matter how much love I carry till this day, simply from these two sentences. I did not marry you to feel alone and I will not be another girl who stayed in a marriage simply for love. Love that practically begged for attention from a love that started from needing control. I love myself too much for that and definitely deserve more than a man who wants me for the wrong reasons. I deserve being in the life and SHARING a life who chooses me EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. And is not afraid to show it. Goodbye and may I see you again in a state where I am better than ever and no longer affected by the songs that play, the images that replay, and the touch that’s felt through every moment remembered. Goodbye to the best and absolute worst thing that has happened to me. :(

I feel like my teenage insecurities reincarnated noong nagkaroon ng pageant dito sa University namin noong nagkaroon ng fair dito katatapos ko lang sa OJT ko noon at noong sumama ako sa Grand parade bilang simula ng university fair namin nakita ko yung mga pambato ng mga iba't ibang College departments kasama na dun yung sa amin--- nung nakita ko sila ang gwapo at ang gaganda nila. Pakiramdam ko nanliit ako noong nakita ko sila --- hindi dahil gusto kong sumali sa mga pageant -- ayoko -- kung hindi sa kadahilanang inaamin ako na kinompara ko yung sarili ko sa kanila --- bakit kaya hindi ako kasing gwapo nung mga lalaking kasali dun --- ampuputi ang kikinis nila o kahit Moreno yung ibang contestant dun ang gwapo pa din --- feeling ko pag tumabi sila sa akin gagwapo sila lalo dahil sa itsura ko --- kaya inaamin ko rin na hindi ko maiwasang mapatingin sa social media accounts nila kumbaga napunta ako doomscrolling dahil dun --- ang sakit-sakit lang kasi maramdaman na naiinggit ako hindi dahil gusto silang siraan kung hindi dahil hindi ko maiwasang maikompara ang itsura ko sa kanilang lahat --- sa lahat ng lugar dun pa talaga sa event na yun --- I was admiring all of them from afar I was mesmerized by their looks --- little did I know that my insecurities returned when I already dumped it when I was 15,16 or 17 years old now that I am in my 20s and in college as well.

Everyday I think about reaching out to you, because I miss you. Yet, i stop myself because my heart cannot take one more heartbreak from you. I truly love you and I hope one day you’ll come back.

I wish people would stop taking advantage of my mental disabilities which cause me to overlook the bad in people. I wish I had true friends. I wish I wasn't this lonely all the time.

I'm afraid of moving on for the greater good and what's scary is that I don't even know why I feel guilty for doing so.

I always have the thought of ending it all in the back of my mind. I missed having parents. I am yearning for a child that I never had the chance to carry in my arms. I am grieving for the me that just wanted to be happy and get treated right. I know I could be happier than this. I am so tired of asking for the bare minimum.

Hi Rix. I’m the kind of person who’s never afraid to tell someone when I like them. For me, confessing is simply a way of acknowledging my feelings and being honest about them. If the person happens to feel the same, then that’s wonderful. And if not, that’s okay too — I’d still quietly admire them from afar without any regrets. But honestly, I never imagined I’d lose you this way. I know our friendship was only beginning, still fragile and new, but I genuinely wanted to be your friend. I also never expected that I’d fall for you this easily. And now, that fragile connection we had is gone, and so are you. Still, seeing you happy with your life now brings me comfort. Please know that I’ll always pray for your happiness. And if our paths ever cross again someday, I hope you’ll meet the best version of me. Love, Belle.

I just wish that I would go back to middle school and change my perspective of life you know enjoy it without caring about the opinions of other children

Hello!

I hope the world is being more kind to all of us, where we can live in a world that everything feels so soft and unheavy— where there are no trauma and baggages that we are struggling to carry it alone. Mahalaga tayo ng walang katanungan at pagdududa tulad ng “pero” at “bakit”. You are human, let yourself to feel those emotions, but don’t also let that emotions carry out the real you. You are more than enough than you think. May your silent cry for help will help you this out.

i wanted you to tell me—and actually mean it—that you got us. that when i was breaking up with you and telling you how drained i was, you’d have said you can carry us out of it while i pick myself up.

People say I am a person who is fully of love: as I talk, as I smile, as I hug and kiss them, as a meet people. Behind all these, I'm really messy. I'm just a person who's having a hard time to ask for help.

Since we broke up I have thought about you every single day. I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to love somebody the way I loved you, even though I’m in a happy relationship it’s just not you. It’s like I left everything I had with you and I’ll never be able to get it back. I hope we can reconnect one day and smile at each other again.

I can’t help but hate being reminded that you’re gone when I need you the most.

Mama, I'm so sorry I did not get the chance to even check on you. It was very sudden. You were very healthy. No one knew that you will leave us this early. I am forever grateful for the life that you'd built for us. I always end up with this belief for comfort, that we are all energy and we can neither be created nor destroyed. We only transform into another form, so I know that you are never gone. I love you! Maraming salamat, mama. 💛

When he was 14, and I was 13 he fell in love with me. After 4.5 years of relationship I moved to a different country and he started doing drugs, after doing long distance for 3.5 years we broke up. Its been 2 years since we broke up and I still love him. I have never in my entire life have seen a guy so loving, caring as him. He showed me what true love is, he made me love myself, yet he was the one who broke my heart into million pieces. It fascinates me so much to realise the guy who has filled my heart with so much love ended up breaking it. Now he moved to the same country as me, but no matter how much I love him I can never go back to him because I have seen him totally change in those years when he was a drug addict. I can never trust him again but I will forever love him. He wants me to come back, but I can’t risk another heartbreak from the same person.

If I could do it over again I wouldn’t be as apologetic. I came to you with a problem that I wanted you to apologise for because you hurt me and you still found a way for me to be the bad guy. I don’t know how I ended up being the one asking for forgiveness or what I was seeking forgiveness for, but a small part of me always knew it would end that way. I just wish you hadn’t taken my dignity with you.

After all I went through in my life, I don’t feel stronger. I feel tired, scared and never in peace.

i miss when i didn’t care about others’ perceptions of me. now i feel like i’m an empty vessel who bases her self-esteem on others’ opinions of her.

I hope one day I can say I’ve healed from the things that quietly broke me that the past no longer aches within me, and that the pain I carried never became the making of who I am. I hope I become someone who can look back without falling apart, and move forward without the weight of old wounds following me everywhere.

bakit sobrang hirap maging mahirap? grabe yung pressure na nakukuha kapag sinasabing "ikaw ang pag asa namin sa kahirapan" pero ang totoo, takot ako. takot akong mag fail na baka sakaling maging mali din ang expectations nila sakin

I wish I had fully healed from the wounds that were never entirely my fault. I hope I never become the kind of girl who keeps looking back at the past just to reopen old pain. I want to someday say that I’ve finally healed, truly moved on, and that the things that once hurt me no longer have the power to affect who I am.

Being excluded hurts, but it should never convince you that you are worthless.

I thought we shared something special, something that can never be broken— turns out it was just me ;)) right mike?

it was never your fault, they we're just asking for something you're not geared up for. dont take it to heart please move on life shouldnt be this serious.

gustong gusto ko na magmahal, at mahalin din.

i care when i walk away. I get furious and indifferent because i cared. This is my language and you become a part of me if you can comprehend. That is how.

I mastered saving people with a smile, while silently bleeding like shattered glass no one ever thought to pick up.

i would rather die remembering the things I shouldn’t than remember none of them at all

ang hirap mag-aral at mahirap rin kung hindi nag-aaral. delayed for a year and it’s the second time na i thought na-dissapoint ko nanaman parents ko. pero they never let me feel that way kaya siguro i keep on striving amd pushing for the better pa.

All I wanted was a sincere apology from you, but instead you cause so much emotional trauma that I don't even know how to trust people anymore.

Moving forward yet always left behind

It’s so hard to fixed and regain what lost something in myself after u left

I don’t feel “pretty” or “beautiful.” I know if I took take better care of myself, I would. But I don’t feel like I deserve to take care of myself either. If anything, I’m just pretty decent.

The way you looked at me when you understood it's over....

at this point in my life dying isn't sad anymore its more crucial decisions to stop affecting everyone around me especially myself because i cant control it anymore, my state.

I don’t know how to be up front with my emotions. More often than not, I’m not even sure what emotion I’m feeling at all. Happy, Sad, Angry, Tired, Excited, Optimistic, Hopeless. Lately, they have kind of all been blending together. In one moment I’ll feel one way, the next I’ll feel another. Sometimes I feel them all at once, but a lot of the time I don’t feel any of them at all. No matter what emotion I’m feeling I always express it as, “I’m Fine.” To be completely honest, I’m not fine. I’m not now, and I never have been. I’m not even really sure what it means to be fine. I think it’s just my way of throwing my feelings under the rug so I can deal with them later. In reality, I just try to forget about my issues and hope that they go away. They never do. My whole life I have felt stuck. I feel like I have the potential inside of me to be someone, to help my family, to help the world, to help bring people the peace that we all deserve. I don’t know what it’s like to feel peace. I never have. Even when the room is quiet and I shouldn’t have a worry in the world. I still can’t manage to quiet my thoughts. I don’t think that I am meant to feel peace. I’m not sure that I ever will. What I do know is that I feel happy when others are at peace. I know how it feels to constantly be unsure of what tomorrow is to bring, and I don’t want anyone else to feel that way. Frankly, I have no idea why I just wrote this. I guess I’m just not sure if I will ever find peace, happiness, or whatever any of that even means. So I guess for now, I’m fine.

i want to give up but my cats need me

this will be the last time that i will talk about them, nor try to think about them. i think its time for me to let go of those wonderful memories that i know myself will never come back. everyone had already outgrew me and i think that’s the end of this friendship with them. it was a wonderful year spent with them, and i’m forever grateful to have friends like them. i hope they do win in life cause i’ll be rooting for them. and i hope they find peace and harmony in whatever they do. thank you all.

im just so tired. nothing seems to work and im just done.

thank you for being so patient with me. i hope you noticed that i hugged you a few seconds longer this time

i always feels so left out of my family. it’s breaking my heart because i’m already the black sheep, but sheep needs love & affection too.

It still hurts even it happened 3 years ago… Betrayal does changes a person, but I felt like I didn’t. I still have a soft heart for people who were bad to me. I still love him and we’re still together [as bf/gf]. He did change, but until when will consistency last?

Miss na miss na kita Ma. Lalo pa malapit na ang 1st Death Anniversary mo. Sana mabuti din ang sitwasyon niyo ngayong magkasama na kayo ni Papa. Pangako po na titibayan ko para sa mga kapatid ko, sa pamilya ko lalo na sa apo niyo na si Arendelle. Mahal na mahal ko kayo…

I am sorry for getting drunk with you and kissing bc of that stupid game, Im sorry for pulling the kiss out a second or two late, I'm sorry for that, I'm so sorry for that, I'm sorry than i made you vulnerable so badly and so naively. I'm sorry I went to that fucking party and im sorry I played that fucking stupid game. I'm sorry for being a fool and I'm sorry for laying down on the floor like the dog i am and having a terrible panic attack. I feel like nobody noticing that was less of a accident and more of a self fulfilling prophecy. I hate that stupid fucking game and i hate that stupid fucking me but if you came back to my life maybe i could learn to live with myself a little more again. I love you so much and I'm sorry. I started to watch your favorite series even if it makes me cringe because i know how much you love it, and sometimes i still dream about napping on your lap like that one time, oblivious of the pain i am now in. I still draw little things for you, and revisit the chats we made when we were together, hoping that somehow, someway, we can be at least friendly again. Is that too much to ask to the world?

i really wanted that job badly. i may act im fine but im not

You’re the reason why I am here. I’m much better than you. I always did my best, you didn’t even care, your loss.

I’m about to become a third-year college student, and I have so many things in life that I want to reach; big dreams, experiences, and many first times. But now, I feel so overwhelmed by the thought of reaching them all. I’m afraid that because there’s so much I want to reach, I might end up unable to lift my arms ang keep going.

Im with my boyfriend for 3 years already and for the past year it feels like I’m only still with him because I’m scared to be alone and that I have no friends other than his. It feels like Im lying to him everyday.

You deserve friendships that don’t make you question your place

For my entire life, my mom chose that she wants me to pursue medicine, it has always been her choice. Not mine.

I hate how we were limited to a few places where our love can exist.

I’m with another person, and i’m happy, but I don’t know why i still cry every time I think of you

January was the last month I've ever spend time with some of the people i love the most in this world. None of them died, I see them daily. I see them talking and joking and planning stuff to do on the weekends, and loving and laughing and crying and comforting each other, and it's all without me. There's a certain type of death that comes for those relationships that quietly rot down, you know? They're the only people i can genuinely be myself with, and without them i feel hollow, like some skinless corpse. A part of me feels like they're ungrateful for all the things i did for them, but the things I did for them aren't things people are supposed to do for others, like not killing myself, learning to be kinder, listen to others, stuff like that. Was i not human enough for them? Was I too rough? Or too demanding? Too much? Or gave too little? Am I that much of a terrible being? I latch onto the memories we left but it looks like you all moved quickly and I don't know how to process that.

i never really knew how to say this to you but i’m sorry for all the things i did. i hurt you, and i know you can never forgive me, but you still are in my dreams. and sometimes i still hope i’m in yours too.

I love him so much, but i’m to shy to admit it

i wanted you to tell me—and actually mean it—that you got us. that when i was breaking up with you and telling you how drained i was, you’d have said you can carry us out of it while i pick myself up.

To the people I never had the courage to fully speak to, There are so many things I carried quietly because I got used to surviving instead of explaining. I learned early that fear can shape a person without anyone noticing. Fear of failing. Fear of not becoming enough. Fear of running out of time while everyone else seems to already know where they’re going. Sometimes I act strong because I don’t know what else to do. But the truth is, there are days when I feel exhausted from carrying expectations, doubts, and wounds I never asked for. Growing up with uncertainty taught me how to hide pain behind jokes, silence, or “I’m okay,” even when I wasn’t. What hurts the most is not the struggle itself, but the feeling that no matter how hard I try to rebuild my life, a part of me is still terrified that I’ll never escape the version of myself shaped by fear and trauma. I wish I knew how to explain that some people are not cold or distant because they don’t care. Sometimes they’re just scared of breaking apart in front of everyone. And maybe that’s the thing I never said out loud: I’ve been trying my best for a very long time.

Dear stranger, I hope life becomes softer on the parts of you that nobody knows are hurting. 💗🩹

sometimes i wish i dont have to carry the emotional burden in every relationship that i am in.

my life’s purpose had become to prove to myself that i’m not a waste of space

I fear that i hope to much and praying for the wrong things

Hello Sir Geloy! I’m also a hobbyist photog here in Manila. For years i’ve been fighting silent battles in my head. I don’t even know what to do, not until nakita ko lahat ng artworks mo. :-) Thank you for validating our unsaid thoughts/emotions. Yung simpleng pagpopost mo ng mga artworks mo, ang laking impact sakin to continue in life. Sana marami ka pang mainspire na mga kagaya namin na lumalaban sa dilim na pilit inaahon ang mga sarili sa labang kami lang ang nakakaalam.

as a daughter, i love my dad. but as a human, i really dislike you for all the things you've done to me.

am i good enough?

The other day my significant other got blackout drunk and told me that other women can do better things for him. And I have never felt so alone in my life in that moment. He swears he doesn’t remember saying it. But it broke my heart and I’ll never forget it. I don’t think I can forgive him.

please don’t come back.

It hurts.

i regret falling in love with someone i know ill never meet again

i would’ve done anything to save our relationship, even though it was your mistakes that broke it. you didn’t put in the effort to fix what you did, so i had to let go to save myself.

I hate and will hate you for the rest of my life for wanting to reconcile with the person who SA'd me

I feel like I can only see my pain through someone else's pain, and seeing how other people struggle and suffer too makes me feel less alone

All I wanted was one last conversation before you left.

i feel that i will never be same happy girl as i was before.

i miss you so much i’m sorry i pretended not to recognize you the last time, i’m scared of the idea of coming back and us falling apart again. i think i’m baños of you and the way you seemed to forgive me so easily.

I’m too young to feel like i’m gonna fail in life. am i really not good enough? or i’m just in the wrong path

I hate the word “hate” but I truly hate you from taking a part of me. For living your life unaffected and leaving me with this trauma to work through

Everyday I wake up and suicides thoight come ariaing in my head. It is not my choice, I didn't choose those thoughts. I always wonder when will it all be done.

I broke so quietly that nobody noticed, and now I carry myself like shattered glass, afraid I can never be whole again.

I don’t regret standing up for myself & saying how I felt. But sometimes, in my weaker moments, I regret that it changed so much between us.

Can someone save me behind these walls

im very sorry for what i did to you there is no excuse, not even that i was just a kid even tho the childhood was very harsh on me, on us. i hope one day we ll be both open enough to have a talk about it and see what we ll do from there. i don t even know if you remember anything, but i do, and it s eating me up every single day

I like to think that someday I'll write a beautiful poem where there's a happy ending for me.

You invade my mind a lot. I miss you even more now that we’re within proximity. I wish we can be together again.

Why is it always the good person who hurt the most?

You never did listen didnt you?

I'm sorry I can't love you the way you deserve. I feel physical pain when thinking about breaking up with you and hate myself for making you feel this way. I wish I could evaporate so I could never hurt anyone again. It's just my fault. I don't know what I'm looking for. Sorry I wasted your time.

i still dont know if i deserve the love that i am receiving right now. what if they dont really want me? what if they wake up one day and decide that they dont want and love me anymore? i'm afraid that i will just accept it and move on, like i always do, because i think, i dont deserve that kind of love. the hurt will probably linger for a long time, but, i'll be okay. i'll probably build up a tougher and higher wall that no one can barge in and climb up and just be alone forever.

here’s what i’m thinking, i respect what you think of yourself because you know yourself better, you do you. but i think that you don’t have an avoidant attachment, you are not one of a kind of those attachers, you just simply can’t reciprocate what i feel toward you and that’s totally fine. now, this is what i’ve learned lately—i realized that i’m one of those anxious attachers and i’ve realized too that i might been draining myself for chasing you and doing everything that i can to make you feel lovable, enough, suffice or whatever just to make you stay, or i might been draining you for chasing you either, i’ve been overthinking that you might be creating reasons just to push me away, that’s just my thinking but i don’t really want to believe what i think. in addition, i’ve read this somewhere that we need to remember that sometimes we don’t respect other’s boundaries by expecting an exuberant amount of soothing and reassurance which isn’t sustainable or fair on the other person, which is very true and i couldn’t agree more. i can feel people pulling away from me because of my anxious attachment style where i take everything personally and imagine the worst case scenario in every little thing. i wouldn’t either if i were to date somebody with an anxious attachment style.

There's no more. No more stars in my eyes. No more butterflies in my stomach. No more glitter that I see around you. I see you for what you are now. You've hurt me. You ruined my peace. It sucks. I just want myself back.

I finally had a chance to work on myself just now and i hope life continues to be gentle on me. i can finally say that i want to live and win this life.

I’m tired of people making mental illness their defining personality trait.

I struggle with seeking for constant validation which leads to me oversharing (esp. with strangers) and at the same time I struggle with building walls around myself because I fear disapproval so much - a paradox enabled by my low self-esteem and the fact that I have no idea who I actually am or want to be

I'm always the one who ends up sacrificing for others. Everytime i have to be the one to let go of someone or something. I hate this. But i can't help it, I'd rather be in pain,than let someone else feel hurt.

My Mum lost her Mum when she was young. I don't think she'll ever stop grieving. She uses alcohol to cope and I've tried to help her for as long as I can remember. One night she said to me, "I think you're my Mum reincarnated". I felt so sick after that. I lost my childhood being an emotional mother to my Mum. She cant apologise for what she isn't aware. I'm trying to forgive her but it's hard. I'm 22. Grieving for a parent I never had.

I Hate getting flashbacks from things I don't want to remember. It feels like my heart suddenly drops and anxiety starts taking me over.

You're a fraud And they'll find out Don't smile like that Teeth bared Blood stained Gums showing A shark seeking blood Hadn't you had enough from me?

I’m really trying my best to survive my mental health struggles all these years, and it is kinda sad to be hit with reality that the people who knew did not care much. Instead of being asked how I am, the most hurtful thing that was said to me was that most of it was my fault.